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" and "Hahahaha what if you signed this marriage certificate?

" He will mention going on dates sometimes, but you've never met any of these girls. Even a brief look at his Instagram will show that his interactions with females are limited to tagging you in photos, liking your photos, commenting on your friends' photos of you, and the occasional Russian sex bot.

As we've said before, heterosexual guys and girls can't really be friends, because in almost every situation at least one party is just biding their time until the other person lets their guard down and finally lets them smash.

The friend zone (a term which we object to on principle but will use for convenience sake here) can be a chill place when you and your guy friend have both agreed that's where you'd like to be, but as literally every sad Reddit commenter has taught us, a lot of guys are only in the friend zone because they don't know how to get out if it.

When some rando girl eventually does pop into his life, it'll take about two days for her to realize who the real woman in his life is and commence hating you with a firey passion.

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